The 10 Commandments of Facebook

While sitting in carpool last week, I couldn't help but laugh when they were talking about this on the Bert Show. Tanner kept asking, "Mommy, what's so funny?" But I couldn't tell him that I was laughing because I'm sooo guilty of a few of these.

So here is the list. The 10 Commandments of Facebook. If you "facebook," (yes, it's a verb), make sure you follow the rules.  Do as I say, not as I do. ;0)


1. Thou shall not post or tag friends in incriminating or embarrassing photos.
A few people I know are guilty of this.  (OK, so I got a phone call from a highly irritated sorority sister a while back, letting me have it for putting her drunk glory days on Facebook ...)  Apparently, some people who Facebook have people as "friends" who are not really friends -- they are more co-workers, bosses, or students.  And said people would prefer not to have their panties showing to those "friends" in those drunk pictures.  Or whatever.  If you have a question about the tag, don't do it.

2. Thou shall not post photo or video updates of thy children’s potty training.
I find this hard to believe, but everyone doesn't want to know about my child's bowel movements. Whatever. But you have to admit, the diaper cream and baby powder pictures were pretty good.

3. Thou shall not use Facebook to converse with thine own significant other.
This one drives me NUTS.  I simply cannot stand it when people talk to their bf's and gf's (and especially their spouses) via Wall or Status Update.  Seriously, we know your life is awesome.  You don't need to prove it.  There is a way to set your account so that alllllllll of your friends cannot see what you write on others' walls.  Fix it so we can't see your business, please.

4. Thou shall not endlessly self-promote.
Never did this one.  I swear.  Ok, maybe a few months back when we were drinking MonaVie ... maybe then ... but here's a clue.  If you are doing this, you are making people want to hide your posts.  Or de-friend you. Like I said, I am guilty of this as well.

5. Thou shall not propose, ask someone out, or dump anyone via wall messages or status updates.
I have not done this, nor can I imagine doing this.  If you do this, you are a very sad person.  (But I have checked other people's statuses and relationship statuses to see what's up with them!)

6. Thou shall not IM anyone you haven’t spoken to in over a decade.
This one is just weird.  For a while, I accepted every friend request that came my way if they went to HS with me, looked even remotely familiar, or claimed to know my brother.  But then, when some of said "friends" began hitting me up on IM and wanting to know how I was and how my mom is and how my brother is and how my husband is, I got a little freaked out.  If I don't talk to you on the phone or see you at least once a year or on holidays, you probably shouldn't IM me.

7. Thou shall not stalk exes and/or ex’s new loves.
We shouldn't do it, but we do.  Enough said.

8. Thou shall not use Facebook as a diet and workout diary.
I had to snicker at this one.  I am 100% guilty of this one.  And Bert said that it is bragging, but I disagree.  I more so posted things like that to get feedback from others.  I wanted to know how others were doing with the same workout.  Or I wanted to share something that I thought was amazing.  Anyway, I'm not sure I agree with this one.

9. Thou shall not “spoil” TV shows in one’s status update.
Shame on you if you do this.  There is nothing worse than finding out how Grey's ends or who won the Bachelor through status update.  We live in the age of TIVO and DVR's; hardly anyone actually watches a show at it's scheduled time anymore.  So stop spoiling.

10. Thou shall post clear, updated photos of thyself.
Funny one.  But I also want to add to this one -- post some old school stuff too.  Nothing is worse than getting a friend request from someone and having no idea who it is.  When you find out he went to school with you, but you still don't recognize him.  A HS pic would be helpful every once in a while!

**  This list is not an original from my brain.  I stole it from Wendy Atterbery's article on The Frisky.