The To-Do List

In college I lived by post-it notes. I had them all over the place - in my day planner, on my mirrors, in my car on the speedometer. Of course, I'm not sure why -- life was so much simpler then and I should've been able to remember what all I had to do. Let's see, get up on time, eat breakfast that was prepared for me, go to class, come back and eat lunch prepared for me, go to class, study, eat dinner prepared for me, chapter meetings, watch TV, talk to Tim, go to bed.

Life was so much simpler then. If only we'd known.

Anyway, I digress.

So when I started working, I also had post-it notes everywhere. My students used to tease me when I walked around with post-its stuck to my clipboard. Sometimes I even had them stuck to my ID badge because I knew it would always be with me.

Now I find myself falling back into this old habit -- making lists. I guess it's not really such a bad thing. At least I stay organized when Mommy brain takes over. I have my list for our weekly menu, my grocery lists (two stores = two lists), my list of things coming up at school for Kendall, my points/things I've eaten list, and the ever-growing TO DO list.

Oh, the to do list. I hate it.

And it seems that even when I think I've reached the bottom of the list, there is always something else lurking that needs to be done. Today the list consists of do the kids' laundry and a load of darks for the grown ups, go to the bank, get a cashier's check to buy Tanner's birth certificate, mail the request and check for the BC, pick Kendall up from school, watch Brady, marinade chicken for dinner tomorrow night, cook sloppy Joe's for dinner tonight, watch American Idol, and go to bed.

Then there are the "other" things that fit between the things on the list -- the things that Tim forgets about ... the other thing that take up my day. Take a shower (which is not easy feat with Tanner around), fold laundry and put it away, change several diapers, feed the animals, let the dog out several times, make the beds, wash the dishes, empty the dishwasher (I LOATHE THE DISHWASHER), blog, check email and facebook (OK, so Tim knows about those), make lunch, eat lunch and clean dishes, pick up Kendall from school, empty backpack and get her to do homework, clean up dinner dishes, bathe kids, brush their teeth and get them in bed. And the list goes on.

Then, about halfway through brushing my teeth I realize that there is something else that needs to be done.

I hope Tim doesn't hate me for sharing this, but this is what blogs are for.

It's been bout a week since we've had sex. So add that to the to-do list.

I hate to even say it that way ... but after talking to some of my friends, apparently this is one thing that does seem to be "put on" the to-do list these days. After taking care of the kids and the house or working all day, sex seems to be the last thing some of us moms want to think about. At least sex at home in our beds. If we were in some far away place where the thoughts of tomorrow's to-do list were not lurking in our heads, we would probably be more eager. It's not that I don't enjoy "quality time" with Tim, it's just that sleep is more of a priority. And boys and girls are just built differently, I believe. (And I've read a lot of books that agree.) Men need that physical relationship to feel appreciated, loved, and close to their wives. But, according to most of the wives I've talked to, women feel more loved and appreciated when their husbands or significant others help around the house, wash dishes, fold the laundry, or change the diapers.

So tonight there's one more thing to add to the to-do list. Because Tim works hard, he needs it and he deserves it. And I love him and want him to be happy.