Can't We All Just Be Honest??

Why is it so hard for us to just tell the truth?  Why do we always have to paint a rosy picture of what life is really like?  I mean, seriously, I know, sometimes, I tend to be a bit negative about things ... but I only do it in order to paint a true picture.  I don't like to sugar coat things.  And I am convinced that some people really don't want me to sugar coat.

They want the truth.

Of course, I am referring only to motherhood here.

And possibly to the age old question, "Does this make me look fat?"  (If I ask you if something makes me look fat, you better tell me if it does!!)

I just feel like there are so many moms around me who are constantly struggling ... with, well, all the "hats" that we mothers have to wear.  And I truly think that if we just talked to each other, honestly, about the things that are going on in our lives, we could help each other out.  When my kids are making me crazy, and my hubby just doesn't seem to get what the big deal is, and I'm not getting any sympathy from my moms, all I really need is for another mom to tell me, "Girlfriend, I've been there.  This is what my kid did today."

I don't necessarily need advice or even a shoulder to cry on.

Sometimes I just need to hear that I'm not alone.

That I'm not the only woman in the world who stares at the clock waiting for 5 o'clock to I can pop the cork in the wine bottle.

That my kids are not the only kids in the world who can be so mean to me that it brings me to tears.

That I'm not the only woman who is excited about not being a stay at home mom anymore.

That I'm not the only one who would sometimes sacrifice sex for an earlier bedtime and an extra hour of sleep.

Do you hear what I'm saying?

I posted a few months ago about all the reading I had been doing ... all those books written by "doctors" and "experts."  I finally had to ask a dear friend for a book that just had stories -- stories other women had divulged about the "true confessions" of motherhood.  And I have to say that the two books I borrowed helped me more than any of the doctors or experts did.  Just to "hear" someone else say that she had considered not answering when her child got lost in the store ... or that she had contemplated driving away just to see if the hubby could really "handle it" as well as he thought he could.    But I have to say, I think it would be more therapeutic if I could hear it from a mom I know.  To know that the woman who looks like she always has it together really doesn't would help me greatly.

And it's not me wanting to be better than someone else.  It's just me wanting to feel validated ... that I'm not crazy ... that the things I'm going through and the things my kids do are completely normal.

So maybe what we need to do is start talking a little more.  Being a little more honest.