Take A Bow

If you've been watching the birthday ticker on my page, or if you've talked to me at all in the last few weeks, you know my "baby" girl's 5th birthday is approaching. Usually on top of the birthday planning (her party was planned 3 months in advance last year), I feel a little slow right now. Her party is planned in my head, but there are still loose ends to tie up. This is the first year I have allowed Kendall to pick who she wants to invite. (Side note : I remember a few years back when my cousin Mya turned 5 and I thought it was so terrible that her parents allowed HER to decide who was invited to her birthday party. I am now kicking myself for judging -- who knew 5-year-old's could be so opinionated?!) So we invited 2 girls from school, 2 from dance, 2 from playgroup, 2 from the neighborhood, 2 other play friends, and cousins. And Tanner. (It was really sweet that she actually wanted Tanner to come and was upset when he wasn't on the list.) While a few have said they will not be able to make it (and I sighed with relief -- no offense), we will still have about 17 children to watch over at the neighborhood pool on Saturday. Should be a fun time.

So what has having a 5-year-old taught me? I have to think about that -- I honestly didn't know what life would be like when we got to this point. Most of you who have been reading probably thought Kendall would never make it to her 5th birthday (remember those years of no sleep???). But now here we are (well, almost, for all practical purposes). She has come so far this year. It seems like a different little girl from the one who had the perfect princess party last year. That 4-year-old was sweet and quiet, caring and cautious, almost to a fault. She threw temper tantrums at times, read quietly in her room others. She was a clinger -- in a new place with new people, she was always stuck close to my side. Slow to smile, slow to answer when questioned, I was afraid that she was going to be shy forever.

But just yesterday morning I was struck by a realization -- Kendall is not the same little girl. While getting ready for vacation bible school, I noticed that - gulp - she didn't need me anymore. I told her to go pick out a shirt to wear, and when I came in to help her get dressed, she had her clothes on (and they matched), she had shoes on, and she was brushing her own hair. She has gained independence. She is fearless, at times. She has grown so much in just 12 short months. Not only has she graduated from pre-K, but she has graduated from her first year of dance. She has graduated from her sleepless nights. She has graduated from her booster seat. She has graduated from her swimmies at the pool. She has graduated out of toddler size shoes and clothes. And she has almost graduated out of taking baths with little brother. How did all of this happen?

Hard to believe I am a mother of a 5-year-old. I am so proud. I swore I would never be one of those moms who cried at recital -- what was I thinking to swear that?! (I mean, really -- I'm crying typing this!) I am including pictures from pre-K graduation and dance recital. Both of these are examples of how much she has grown -- my "baby" stood on those stages, beaming with pride, and shined like a star!! No nerves, so tears, no anxiety -- she truly is a different girl now! And I never thought I could love her more than I did the day I first laid eyes on her, but I do. My cup runneth over ...

Still here ...

I'm still here. I know it's been almost a month since my last post ... but I do have a good reason. Well, several good reasons. Kendall finished school, so we've been crazy tryiung to keep everyone busy. The pool opened, so we've been swimming a lot. Tanner has been a little sickly lately, so I've been dealing with him. Tim is undergoing some upheaval at work, so I've been internally stressing about that. The laptop was on the fritz and had to be rebuilt. My biggest excuse. And I have begun the P90X program ... which has just about killed me, and it's only been 3 workouts. I hurt in places that I never knew hurt. My bones, hair, and fingernails are sore. I swear. But it will all be worth it in 90 days ... not as soon as I would like, but soon enough.

Tim and I took before pictures on day one, and I am going to post them and give you the full rundown as soon as I can move far enough to get the camera and download pictures!

Just wanted to let everyone know that the Morris' are still here. In case you were worried. :)

It's all coming to an end --

I can't believe we are almost into our summer vacation around here. Kendall is only 4school days away from pre-school graduation and carefree days. I still have yet to register her for kindergarten; I'm hoping for a job offer where I can just register her near me. If not, we'll register her sometime in the summer. With summer looming, our family in embarking on the crazy season of summer when we seem to have something to do every weekend ... sometimes we need to be in more than one place at a time.

So this morning was the first of our "graduation" events. Kendall's Senior Picnic. Well, it wasn't much of a picnic with the sprinkling and cool temperatures. I probably looked like the worst mom with my kids dressed in shorts and t-shirts/tank tops. And I myself even had on flip flops with shorts and a tank top. It was a picnic, after all. And the weather said 74 and partly cloudy. Anyway, we packed up the coolers with Capri Suns for Kendall's classmates, and headed to the Bridgemill Pavilion. I've never been there -- but wow! It is this huge sand box with swings and slides ... we'll definitely be visiting many times this summer!

Once we unloaded, Kendall and Tanner were able to run free. I was honestly worried about how they would do at this function; I've never been around Kendall when she's "at school" with her friends. At first she stayed close to Tanner, more for his protection than for her shyness. Once a few of her friends were spotted, she was off. It was so much fun to watch her play ... she has grown so much this year. I remember when Kendall was so shy and cautious around other people. Now she is happy and outgoing ... I'm so proud of how much she has accomplished this year. And her friends are truly sweet kids. They flew on the zip line, pumped their little legs on the swings, chased each other, and even caught some crickets! We had so much fun, even if the weather wasn't cooperating!

And where was Tanner during all of this? Hanging out with the boys. The big boys. I thought maybe he would want to stay with me or want to play with the little brothers. But, no, he was running and jumping and digging right along side the 4 and 5 year old boys. So now I have a better idea of what he will be like if he has to go to day care next year. When it was time to eat, I thought I was going to have to drag both of them out of the sand, freezing and all.

Annd what was I doing while they were playing? Just standing there watching. Taking it all in. Sometime after we got there, I realized this is the first time I've not had one of them clinging to my leg. While it was a great feeling, it was also bittersweet; my babies are growing up and they don't always "need" me anymore.

Now we have a few more things to look forward to ... garage sale this weekend ... pre-K graduation next week ... then dance recital. And then my baby girl will be turning 5 years old. Where has the time gone?????

Like We Were Never Apart

Every summer since the 5th grade we've tried to get together. Of course, over the years it has gotten harder and harder, between jobs and kids. So this year I was ecstatic when Stacey asked to come visit for a few days. We planned in perfectly ... Tim had a fishing trip with his work this past weekend, so it was only natural that Stacey could come then. I'd have another set of hands around the house while he was gone ... and we could have some real girl time without having to worry about annoying a man! So Friday night at 9:45 my best friend walked through my door. poor thing, she had driven in a torrential downpour for over 2 hours to get here, driving from Virginia for 10 hours straight. We hugged, brought the luggage in, and settled down like we had never been apart.

It's funny how this always happens. I'm always a bit nervous before we see each other -- how will it be? will we still have things to talk about? have we changed? will we still have a lot in common? I don't know why I even worry about these things. No matter how long it's been (I haven't seen her since I was pregnant with Tanner), it's like we're neighbors and we see each other all the time. And we don't even get to talk on the phone that much ... but we've never lost each other.

So we had a weekend filled with fun friend stuff. We "shopped" without buying much on Saturday ... we looked at house stuff ... we visited with Mom ... I watched my kids love on their Aunt Stacey ... we even got to go out for Mexican and margaritas ... oh, and ice cream. He he he What else are best friends supposed to do?? We were able to do some real talking during our dinner, catching up on the things that we never have time to talk about on the phone or over e-mail. It's hard to have a real conversation with kids in the background.

Then, Monday afternoon it was time to say goodbye. Again. I always dread it because we don't know how long it will be before we see each other again. I tried not to cry when we hugged, but I can't hold back those tears any better now than I could in the 5th grade when she moved away.

I am truly lucky to have a friend like Stacey -- one who never judges me, no matter how differently we may view things. She loves me unconditionally ... and I'm so blessed to have her in my life!