The Lesser of Two Evils

**WARNING: THIS IS A SLEEP UPDATE. YES, YOU WILL HAVE TO "LISTEN" TO ME WHINE FOR A FEW PARAGRAPHS. AND YOU MUST FEEL SORRY FOR ME AT THE END!**

So here's where we are now. Still tired. Still taking it one night at a time. But I'm still using the Ferber method, too. We have yet to have a solid night of sleep since we started over 2 weeks ago. But Kendall does put herself to sleep. Unfortunately, she still wakes up several times in the night. She does one of two things when she wakes up, and neither of them are going back to sleep on her own. When she wakes up, she either A) calls for me to come to her room, or B) comes to get me out of my bed to put her back in hers.

Yeah, I know, it really doesn't seem much better than it was before. But I do sleep in my bed ... not in hers. She does spend 90% of the night in her bed. And most nights she goes back to sleep the first time I shut her door.

We are up to closing the door the first time at 4 minutes. I've been sorta wishy-washy with the closing of the door. Usually, the first time she gets up it's to go to the bathroom. So I help her go and then she gets back in bed. I don't like to close her door then because I don't want her to feel like she shouldn't get up to go to the bathroom. The last thing I need is a 4-year-old who doesn't sleep in her bed by herself and wets the bed. So, most of the time she goes right back to sleep after her bathroom break. Then, many nights she wakes again, about 3 hours later.

So I'm still awake every 3-4 hours of the night. Am I really getting better sleep? Not really. Is Kendall sleeping better? Not so much. So why don't I just go back to the old way of doing things? And crawl in bed with her the first time and get 7+ hours of sleep? I suppose I'm choosing the lesser of two evils. I truly don't want my daughter to be needing someone to put her back to sleep when she is in college. Her roommate may not appreciate it. I can give up a few weeks of sleep if it means she will learn to do this on her own.

While it does not seem like this is working, I have to keep telling myself that she has made a huge leap -- she goes to sleep by herself. Every time. Tim doesn't have to sit in the room with her. I don't have to hold her hand or rub her back. So I guess that's progress.

Of course, tonight she asked me what I would do if she got out of bed. (She asks this every night, I guess hoping I will say something different.) I told her that I would shut her door if she got out of her bed, just like last night. Her response?

"Will you shut the door and go away? Or will you shut the door and stay like you did last night and open my door when the time is up?"

So I guess she's figured it out. Wonder what Dr. Ferber would say about that.