Parenting 201

I'm wondering what I missed when I didn't go to those first-time parent classes when I was pregnant.  I was on strict bed rest for a month, so I skipped the hospital tour (seeing that I had already been there 3 or 4 times before delivery) and the breastfeeding class (you've heard how that turned out for me).  I seem to remember there was an option for a first-time parent class as well that Tim and I decided against for unknown (or un-remembered) reasons.

Now here I am, at 7 AM 6.5 years later, after a night of tossing and turning, wondering if that class and its instructor could have told me how to handle our current situation.

This girl thing is hard.

I talked to K yesterday afternoon about her alleged indiscretions at school.  The first time I tried, she denied it.  At first.  But just like I knew she would, once I told her that she wouldn't be in trouble if she just told the truth, she crumbled.  I used my Mommy Eyes on her.  She admitted that she did in fact show the un-named boy her panties and that she did pull her shirt up for him.  Of course, I had expected her to tell me it was a complete lie, so I was unprepared.

Note to all you Girl-Mommies -- Be prepared for the worst.

So after she admitted she did it, I proceeded with the usual questions ...

Why?  When?  How did it happen?  Why?  Why?  WHY????

Those were followed with ...

Kendall, look at me.  Put your legs down and look at me in my eyes.  This is serious, Kendall.  Mommy's not kidding.

Anyway, I got no information about which boy it was, which led me to say, "You showed your panties to a boy and you don't even remember his name?!"  (I'm having nervous flash forwards to our teen years here ...)  Because I was left with nothing else to say (yes, unprepared), I left it with, "If you ever do this again, you will be in SUPER BIG TROUBLE."

Yeah, that'll get her.

When K headed outside to play (and not with the big girls in the neighborhood -- I'm thinking I may need to have a talk with them before we proceed with playtime), I scoured the shelves of the family room.  There must be a book that covers this, right?  Parenting 101 covered all the new baby stuff -- changing, sleeping, feeding, burping, first aid ...

But I need a book that covers indecent exposure and being a follower!!!

Where are those books?

I then decided I was going to wait for Tim to get home and let him talk to her.  But he was working late and I really wanted this taken care of before the weekend so I wouldn't have to worry about it anymore.  (Uh-hunh, right.)  So then I found the kids rolling in the grass, I took it as an opportunity to bring them back in the house (picture grass everywhere ...) and finish our talk.  While K changed her clothes, I asked her again to tell me who the boy was.  She said he told her to pull up her shirt and pull down her pants, and that this wasn't the first time.  When she said she couldn't remember his name, I told her that she could point him out when I am there Wednesday ...

And that did the trick. :)

"It was --------, Mommy"  (The boy's name has been omitted for his protection.)

So now I have a name, and a story to work with.  I know several people have told me this is not a big deal and I should just let it go.  But I really don't want everyone thinking that my daughter is the 1st grade hoochie.  I talked to K and told her why it is important to keep the underparts covered up and why it is important to go with your first instinct when you feel like something is wrong.  This is the second time this boy told her to do this, and she told him no the first time ... so I'm not sure why she cracked this time.  I can tell it was innocent enough and she didn't mean anything by it, but I certainly don't want to continue on into puberty with a little girl who gives in and follows the pack every time just to be cute or cool.

Hence the tossing and turning.

This parenting stuff is so hard.  I mean, I did OK making them and  growing them ... and I did pretty well in the baby stages, all things considered.  But this new stuff is hard -- I'm not sure I'm cut out for it.  How do I know that what I'm saying is sinking in?  Do I just keep repeating it?  Do I record my voice and put it under her pillow at night, sending subliminal messages?

"Do not show your panties ... do not show your panties ..."

But then again, I don't want her to be ashamed of her body and think that nudity is a bad thing.  I want her to be proud of her body and know that she is beautifully created.

I just want her to know she is beautifully created within the walls of our home. :0)

I suppose this is just one of the difficulties of having a little girl.  Certainly there will be more in the future ...

Now I need to head to the bookstore and see if I can find the Cliffs Notes for that Parenting 201 class ...