100 Days

Can you believe it's been 100 days since the 1st day of school?

Craziness, I know. For the 100th day of school, Kendall's class was asked ton bring a wide assortment of tasty treats, like Fruit Loops, marshmallows, pretzels, and M&Ms. She told me they had a wonderful party to celebrate their 100 days and all they have learned thus far.

Secretly, I know her teachers are really celebrating the fact that they are over half-way through the school year.

I remember celebrating such an event! 80 days to go ... and I'll have a 1st grader.

What?!

Pick Your Battles with Your Picky Eaters

Did anyone see Dr. Phil today? The whole show was dealing with the strange fights parents are having with their kids. There was one woman who was afraid her daughter (age 9) was OCD because she was so picky about what she wears. (I was having visions of Kendall freaking out and kicking her shoes across the room because the seam of her sock was on her toes.) Another woman was stressed out about how messy her kids' rooms were. But the one that really hit home for me was the woman who wanted to know what to do about her picky eater. I know that several friends are also wondering about the same thing -- especially when there's so much contradiction when it comes to what "they" say about the situation.

This woman had a 9-year-old son who would sit for hours in front of his plate at the table. He would vomit when she made him try new things. She had tried several things to get him to eat, like sending him straight to bed, bribing him, taking away his electronics, not letting him play sports. (Sounding slightly familiar to some of you, I know.) Then Dr. Phil put up a slide showing what this boy's preferred menu consists of ...

peanut butter and jelly
flavored yogurt
any kind of pasta
french fries
grilled cheese
sloppy joes
hot dogs
fruit

Holy mackerel!! This is almost exactly what Tanner's menu looks like!

And the mom's question was, "What do I do about it? Do I make him something I know he will eat? Or do I continue the way we are, fighting about eating and forcing him to eat what we have or not eat at all?"

Wanna know what Dr. Phil's suggestion was?

I'll tell you this -- it's NOT what I thought he would say at all.

He (along with Dr. Sears from The Doctors Show) said that if he doesn't want what you have chosen for the menu, allow him to make something else. Why not? He said that this is not a battle you should be choosing to fight. There are so many other things in the world that we, as parents, should really be concerned with, and forcing a child to eat is not one of them. He also commented that if a child gets hungry enough, he'll eat the place mat. (I've heard that one before! Still have yet to see proof of this place mat-eating phenomenon.)

Of course, Dad of the Year had to pipe in, "I agree with you 100%, Dr. Phil."

What?? Where did that come from??

Anyway, I partially agree. I mean, as long as they eat something that is somewhat good for them, who cares what it is? And if my kid was 9 and could make his own alternative meal, then I'd be gung-ho for this. But seeing as how I never get to sit down at the table and eat the same time my family does ("Mommy, I need some juice." "Mommy, where's my spoon?" "Mommy, I don't like this spoon." "Mooommmmm, I'm not gonna eat anything." "Mom, I need a napkin.") I'm not willing to make another meal. I work hard to come up with my menus, cook the food, and get it on the table. The last thing I want to do is cook something that I know they will like if they try it and then have to make PB&J for Tanner and mac-n-cheese for Kendall.

See, that's the other problem.

If given the choice, my kids would always request something different as their alternative meal. So not only would I be making my gloriously well-balanced meal that no one wants to eat, I'd also be making two other things for the kids.

No way. Nada. I decided when the kids started eating big people food that I was done making separate meals. I'm not a short-order cook. They get to make choices with their dinner (ie. They can choose what they want to drink, what fruit they want, and what type of meat they want, occasionally.), and of course there's the choice of eating it or not. And that's where I have to draw the line.

Dr. Phil didn't even say anything about the usual "put some of the other stuff on their plate no matter what." Does this mean everything we've learned about feeding our kids was false?

And if so, what am I supposed to do with all the other advice "they" gave me???

Geesh -- just when I thought this parenting thing was getting easier ...

???

Apparently I need to add "BLOG" to my list more often. My blogaday isn't going to well, I see. Somehow I missed 2 days in there ... oh well, it was a long weekend! Now I've done two today, so that makes up for yesterday. I'll also add to my list for tomorrow to post about my shopping trip yesterday and the new things it made me learn about myself!

The To-Do List

In college I lived by post-it notes. I had them all over the place - in my day planner, on my mirrors, in my car on the speedometer. Of course, I'm not sure why -- life was so much simpler then and I should've been able to remember what all I had to do. Let's see, get up on time, eat breakfast that was prepared for me, go to class, come back and eat lunch prepared for me, go to class, study, eat dinner prepared for me, chapter meetings, watch TV, talk to Tim, go to bed.

Life was so much simpler then. If only we'd known.

Anyway, I digress.

So when I started working, I also had post-it notes everywhere. My students used to tease me when I walked around with post-its stuck to my clipboard. Sometimes I even had them stuck to my ID badge because I knew it would always be with me.

Now I find myself falling back into this old habit -- making lists. I guess it's not really such a bad thing. At least I stay organized when Mommy brain takes over. I have my list for our weekly menu, my grocery lists (two stores = two lists), my list of things coming up at school for Kendall, my points/things I've eaten list, and the ever-growing TO DO list.

Oh, the to do list. I hate it.

And it seems that even when I think I've reached the bottom of the list, there is always something else lurking that needs to be done. Today the list consists of do the kids' laundry and a load of darks for the grown ups, go to the bank, get a cashier's check to buy Tanner's birth certificate, mail the request and check for the BC, pick Kendall up from school, watch Brady, marinade chicken for dinner tomorrow night, cook sloppy Joe's for dinner tonight, watch American Idol, and go to bed.

Then there are the "other" things that fit between the things on the list -- the things that Tim forgets about ... the other thing that take up my day. Take a shower (which is not easy feat with Tanner around), fold laundry and put it away, change several diapers, feed the animals, let the dog out several times, make the beds, wash the dishes, empty the dishwasher (I LOATHE THE DISHWASHER), blog, check email and facebook (OK, so Tim knows about those), make lunch, eat lunch and clean dishes, pick up Kendall from school, empty backpack and get her to do homework, clean up dinner dishes, bathe kids, brush their teeth and get them in bed. And the list goes on.

Then, about halfway through brushing my teeth I realize that there is something else that needs to be done.

I hope Tim doesn't hate me for sharing this, but this is what blogs are for.

It's been bout a week since we've had sex. So add that to the to-do list.

I hate to even say it that way ... but after talking to some of my friends, apparently this is one thing that does seem to be "put on" the to-do list these days. After taking care of the kids and the house or working all day, sex seems to be the last thing some of us moms want to think about. At least sex at home in our beds. If we were in some far away place where the thoughts of tomorrow's to-do list were not lurking in our heads, we would probably be more eager. It's not that I don't enjoy "quality time" with Tim, it's just that sleep is more of a priority. And boys and girls are just built differently, I believe. (And I've read a lot of books that agree.) Men need that physical relationship to feel appreciated, loved, and close to their wives. But, according to most of the wives I've talked to, women feel more loved and appreciated when their husbands or significant others help around the house, wash dishes, fold the laundry, or change the diapers.

So tonight there's one more thing to add to the to-do list. Because Tim works hard, he needs it and he deserves it. And I love him and want him to be happy.