WWJD?

This week has been a learning experience for me.  Just recently, the kids have been showing more of an interest in death and dying -- not so much the morbidity of it, but the actual logistics.  I've always had a tough time explaining Heaven and the concept of the afterlife to them; unfortunately, they have had to hear about death and Heaven from a very early age.  So on our last library trip I checked out What's Heaven? by Maria Shriver.  It's a cute little book in which a Great Grandmother has passed away and the GGdaughter is going to the funeral.  So the mom must explain why people die, what a funeral is for, and what Heaven is like.  The best part about the book is that, in every answer the mother gives to her daughter's questions, she begins her answer with, "I think."

Of course, as I read it, Tanner's thoughts and eyes wandered (I feel for his teachers in a few weeks!!), but Kendall listened and looked at the pictures.  Every few seconds she would look up at me, I'm certain, to see if my eyes were tearing up.  I still have a hard time talking about death at all, especially with my 6-year-old.  Only at the end did a tear actually slip out when the mother says that she will always miss her grandmother but that the pain will subside.  Kendall looked up at me then and asked, "Does it still hurt, Mommy?"  I nodded my head and she put her little hand over my heart and said, "But he's still right there."

Seriously??  Who is this kid??  Sometimes she amazes me!

So after we read the book, it appears my kids are obsessed with God and Jesus and Heaven.  They consider God/Jesus/PawPaw to be one in the same, which I think is cute, though not accurate.  Just a few minutes ago this blog was triggered because I heard them playing in the family room and having a rather serious discussion.

Kendall:  Jesus is a boy, but he has long hair.
Tanner:  PawPaw had long hair once too.  I saw a picture.
K:  When you go to Heaven, you can't suck your thumb anymore.
T:  Why can't I suck my thumb?
K:  Tanner, what would Jesus do?  Would he suck his thumb?
T:  I'm not going to because I will be big like PawPaw.
K: Plus you won't have a thumb.
T:  Why not?  Will Jesus cut it off?
K:  No, silly.  You won't have a thumb because your body with your thumbs will be buried in a box in the ground here ...

Great, hunh?  That's one of the things the book explained -- what is a funeral.  So after I read it I had to explain what PawPaw's funeral was like, and Tanner thought it was super cool because there were so many motorcycles there.  I told them about how lots of people came to see his "Earth suit" in the box and how we all went to say goodbye before they put his "Earth suit" in the ground.  But I've always told them that they can talk to PawPaw anytime ... just like they can talk to God anytime.  So they were confused about how to talk to him if he was buried over by Aunt Faye's house.  Again, I explained that it's just his shell ... not his soul ... that is buried in the ground.  His soul is all around us so they can talk to him anytime, anywhere.

That seemed to make them content for now.  They've already asked to go see where PawPaw's body was buried -- Bless my mom for having the strength to sit through that conversation with me! -- and I told them I would take them (though I've only been there once since he died).  Their eyes lit up at the thought of getting to see PawPaw ... broke my heart ... a little more explanation was needed there.

This is just proof that as they get older, I'm going to have explain a lot ... for now we'll just look at pictures and talk about how awesome he was.  It makes me feel good that they think they knew him before he died -- even Tanner talks about how he misses him though he wasn't even born.  I want them to feel like they knew him.